So... Now What?

Officially, today was my second day at my new job. Yesterday, on my first day... I went in and much to my surprise, the bosses weren't there and my new co-workers didn't even know that I was going to come in on that day!

Well... they quickly gave me a tour of the office and introduced me to all the people (which I can't remember all their names! *shame*) and the IT guy set me up with an email account and set up my own PC cubicle station.

Then.. for the whole day on my first day, I did absolutely NOTHING! I surfed the web, pretending to read about our clients for 8 hours! Seriously, and this is no joke.. I could literally feel my brain turn into a rotting pile of soupy mush as I sat there staring blankly at the pc screen.. then out the window.. then back at the screen... then daydreaming... then finally counting down to "closing time".

SECOND DAY! which was today... in the morning, they made me edit client profiles. Took me about 30 minutes, but I decided to stretch it out to 3 hours (up until lunch time) why? I didn't want my brain to turn into slush again. At least I was doing something. ...After lunch, the boss came back.... with TONS of work for me to suddenly do! Edit this article... write about this.. summarize this... transcribe this...

OK! one at a time, please! I haven't finished anything today, so I just have to continue tomorrow... of course!

So... the first day, my brain turned into slush... and on the second day, it was forcedly put to work all of a sudden! But, don't get me wrong... i do think it's going to be a fun job.. (how i hope! ^_^)

Let's just see what happens next....

Counting Down to a New Beginning

In less than a week, I will say 'adios' to my freelancing job and say 'hello' to my new regular, normal, go-to-the-office job. Yes, I accepted the job offer and yes, my anxiety level is still shooting through the roof.

Everyday, I try to pace myself and try to breathe normally. So, when I wake up every morning ever since I decided to accept the job--even though I'm anxious beyond my anxiety limit--I try to think to myself: "this is a new beginning with new possibilities! I can do it!"

Yes, I've come to the point where I have to psych myself! But, here I am.. about to take the plunge! My sister tells me I look like a goldfish about to swim with the piranhas. I tell her, it's ok! Those piranhas will teach me to act like one! and she says, "unless they eat you first." So, at night, i think to myself: "Piranhas or sharks, I will take the plunge and dive head first and survive! Yes, I can!"

Public relations writing... Though I have absolutely NO idea what that is, besides the fact that I will write about a certain product/client, I will just GO AHEAD with it! Dealing with the public... honestly, I am shy. If i could crawl into my shell, i would.. but NO! I would face the world and meet and greet new people (who knows, my prince charming might be one of the people I would meet in this new job!). Teamwork? I'm all for it! Let's go! I can do it!

Well.. let's just find out what happens... til then, I will try to keep my anxiety level on a normal scale... though it's peaking now! YIKES!

New beginning.. here I come! ^_^

A Window Opens

You know what they say, "When one door closes, another one opens".
I've been feeling BLAH about my freelance job as an english tutor mainly because it's irregular. I knew that when decided to do it and thought, "hmm.. this will just be temporary"... well... i've been doing it for more than 2 years and it's STILL irregular!

For the past few weeks, I've been feeling bummed out about my so-called job and was almost going to declare it as the "lowest of the low points in my life".

A simple text message changed it.

One night, my friend sent me a text message asking if I already found a "normal, regular" job. I simply replied, "nope". She asked me to email her my resume and a writing sample. So I did!

A few days later, I received an email from the company she's working at. It read: "Please come in on Monday, April 5, at 10am for an exam and interview". WOW! I though, "is this it? is this the answer to my prayers and all my complaints about how my so-called freelancing job is boring and stagnant?"

I went in on Monday and took the writing exam (which I finished in 30 minutes!) I was interviewed and my interviewer said, "I'm impressed with the way you write articles! I have to talk to my boss about you and we'll give you a call within the day"

I went home, had lunch, played my nintendo DS (yes, i have one! I'm such a video game dork, really). In the middle of a racing game, my cellphone rang. Darnit! That call just made me crash my car! "hello?", i answered. "Hi this is _______. I read your resume and your article, please come in tomorrow for a follow-up interview"

So I did! I went back tuesday and the boss talked to me and said, "I'm impressed with your writing skills! I want you to work with me with ______ account!" She handed me a contract and I'm due in the office in about 2 weeks from now.

Now.... I haven't signed the contract YET! She gave me a week to ponder and decide about the work load, the job description, the benefits and such. Everything looks good... my only concern is: I'VE NEVER WORKED IN PUBLIC RELATIONS BEFORE.. EVER!! AND I'VE NEVER WRITTEN FOR PUBLIC RELATIONS/PROMOS... EVER!!!

I'm scared, anxious, jittery about all this. Don't get me wrong, I'm psyched about having a "regular, normal" job (plus, my friend works there, too!). I'm just having all these mixed emotions about the job itself. What if I screw up? What if I make mistakes? What if they realize that I'm not such an impressive writer after all??

All these concerns, fear and anxiety circle in my head! I can't even sleep well at night after those two interviews.

Please help? I just need a little push...

I always think that this is a great opportunity.. there's a reason why my freelance job is stagnant and bland these past few weeks... it's because something out there is better.. and it's waiting for me.... now i think, "can i really be brave and jump in a pool full of sharks and tame them?"

Sticky Notes of Thoughts

The Persistent Heart: A Short Story

(Original/fiction)

Once there was a girl with a heart as big as it could be. She loved to hear her heart flutter as she looked at something that was pleasing to her, like a beautiful Dali painting at a nearby museum.

One day, as she was walking along the park eating an ice cream cone, her eyes happened to wander towards the eyes of a charming man with beautiful green eyes. Her heart started beating loudly and felt as if it wanted to jump out of her chest and run towards him.

She dropped her ice cream cone because her heart sent shivers through her arms as it beat louder and faster.

He smiled.
She smiled back.

She sat down on the bench and tried to regain her composure. She coyly tucked her hair behind her ear and flashed a hint of a smile. She saw him walking towards her! Her heart beat faster and faster.

He was getting closer... and closer...

"HI!" came the sultry honey-smooth voice of the man.

She lifted her head so she could reply back with her gorgeous eyes ONLY to see that he was walking toward a DIFFERENT GIRL!!

She was embarrassed! She remained on the bench sitting there with a blush of embarrassment on her cheeks.

The couple walked away as she breathed more evenly and her heart relaxed. She was about to leave when she heard somebody sit beside her. She looked with curious eyes and saw a man with deep-brown eyes and alabaster skin.

Her heart started beating fast again.
At first she thought that her heart was beating TOO loud. She then realized that her heart was hearing the nervous beating of his heart as well as they sat there and got to know more about each other.

It's in the Way You Look at Things

Today, I woke up with the annoying serenade of birds outside my dirty window. I closed opened my ears to the piercing beautiful songs of the birds as I groggily slowly open my eyes to face take in the new day.

I'm dreading looking forward to what's in store for me today. I'm sure to meet a lot of people who will be rude smile and nod a simple 'hello'. I also know that my little monster student will give me a headache something to think about during the day. Like, for example, how to discipline him calm a hyper 10-year-old-boy with some sort of punishment patience and soothing words... sometimes even a joke or a funny anecdote will do. He's trouble innocent happiness bundled in a little monster's boy's body. At the end of the day, I'm sure I'll have a ton of stress a smile on my face and bonk myself on the head be proud of myself about how I handled today's horrible life's challenges.

What a depressing, tiring wonderful, sun-shiny, great day it will be!!

It's almost the weekend!! Happy Weekend, everyone!

MUCH LOVE!!

A Little Bit Goes a Long Way

Have you been feeling down in the dumps lately? Trust me, you are not alone. My blog will have a slight make-over and change slowly in time to offer help and inspiration to everyone through stories I’ve heard, or stories that I’m going to personally write (fictional or non-fictional).

I, honestly, have been feeling like I’m riding the roller coaster of life with too many twists and turns—sometimes I’m up; sometimes, I’m down. We all experience that. That’s why we need each other to lend a helping hand, especially during those times when we feel like we weren’t given our share of happiness.

All we need is a little help from our friends and a little inspiration, which can go a LONG way. Often times, when I feel down, I turn to my pen and any piece of paper I can get my hands on (sometimes even tissue paper!) and start writing a poem or a short story and let my emotions control the pen to write words that express what I feel inside. After that, I email it to a close friend of mine and let her read my stories/poems and she gives me feedback. It makes me feel a whole lot better. Why? For one, I was able to get all the negative feelings off my chest and onto a piece (sometimes pieces) of paper. Two, a friend’s kind and uplifting comments give me the strength I need to hold my head up high when it’s slowly slacking down with stress.

The next time you feel down, try a little creative outlet. Try writing! You just might surprise yourself at how much you want to get off your chest via writing! And don’t think that you’re not “creative” enough to write! Everyone can write because everyone has a story or a feeling inside just waiting to get out. And remember, you are not alone. Your friends are a phone call away, and I am just a click away. ^_^

Chicken Soup, Anyone?

Before we start..
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RANDOMNESS
NOTES FROM BENNETT ST.

welcome them to SITS and show them some SITStah love! ^_^

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Anyway, we all know that chicken soup is great for us when we're sick with the cold or fever or flu. Did you know that chicken soup also releases "happy hormones" when you're depressed? Yep! One of my mom-students told me this fact. Interesting, isn't it? It has the same effect as eating chocolates when you feel sad, stressed, or way bummed out. ^_^ (mmm.. chocolates...the darker the better..)

Recently, the same mom-student told me that she will lend me her book. I was surprised to see what it was the next day... CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL!! We are all familiar with this series of books, right? Years ago, when I was in high school, I've collected and read Chicken Soup for the teenage soul (I and II), for the Pet Lover's Soul and for the College Soul. All of these books have made me feel better and showed me a glint of hope and encouragement that I badly needed that time.

Now... I'm reading 4th Serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul (the one my mom-student let me borrow) and the stories have (like before) moved me to tears, put a smile on my face and showed me positive light. I recommend this book to everyone! Not just those who need a "feel-good" book... but really the stories are heart-felt, touching and real. Most importantly, it reminds me that there are a lot of good, kind-hearted people out there in the world.